Positive Singles Need Not Fear The Stigma Any Longer!
Having a sexually transmitted disease shouldn’t restrict you from dating; there’s still hope for positive singles. What are we trying to say is, you can still find the love you deserve. You still have those desirable and lovable qualities which made other people become attracted to you before you got the virus. Believe it or not, an STD won’t hinder you from finding the right person, although the search will be a little different, many people have been successful finding a happy & health relationship.
It’s Not as “Disgusting” as You May Think
The truth is, sexually transmitted disease cases are very common. In fact, some sources state STD/STIs impacts up to 50% of the US population, and the WHO (World Health Organization) states 2/3 of the world has HSV, the herpes virus. This means, some of your friend also have a secret. Shh!
Though, honestly speaking, dating after an STD diagnosis may be a little awkward. With that said, if you hope for intimacy with your date, it is common to consider keeping our positive [diagnosis] skeleton in the closet. Unfortunately we live in a judgemental society, so facing the STD stigma becomes terrifying, especially when you feel alone in your struggle.
Of course there are plenty of important discussions to be had when meeting someone new, future goals, lifestyles, if they are married or not, and of course your sexual past, ugh!
It’s completely up to you to decide whether or not you should disclose your condition. But when the relationship moves to sex, make sure to follow these two golden rules:
- Never wait until after sex or any intimacy involving genitals.
- Don’t wait until you’re about to get sexually intimate.
The reason is, during a hot and heavy session your partner can become blinded with attraction leaving them to do something they wouldn’t normally do which will ultimately leave them feeling betrayed and upset with themselves. A last might confession is certainly not the way to start a healthy relationship.
Changing Your Approach
If before your diagnosis you enjoyed starting a relationship by having sex as a way to ‘welcome’ your new partner, you might want to reconsider your thoughts. It would be mutually beneficial to reveal your condition to someone who’s already attracted to you, as a person. Rest assured that fondling, kissing, and cuddling are safe as long as you don’t have HSV on your lips. This means there’s no need to confess about your problem before you do these. However, always trust your gut as to how physically you want to get before having The Talk. Keep in mind, when things start to get ‘hot,’ one thing can lead to another, and you don’t want to find yourself in the situation described above.
I Don’t Want to Risk Giving It to Someone I Love
The fear of passing an STD on to another person always remains. It is a common fear and for good reason, I mean, who in their right mind would want to subject another person to all the negative feelings and emotions they have experienced.
For starters, the typical symptoms of an STD are not always severe, Though, the best thing you can do to avoid the feeling of guilt about potentially transmitting the disease is by being honest with your partner, and keeping them safe. If the person is not willing to date you, then maybe it wasn’t true love, and that is okay. Most important, just get back on the horse, you will eventually meet the right person. STD or not, the process is the same for everyone.
Dealing with Rejection
Anyone who dates, even those who are not positive, should be ready for possible rejection. Though, it’s more common for those with an STD(s), because the person you’re seeing may retreat once he/she finds out about it. If you end up getting the, “I just want to be friends” talk after telling them about your situation; perhaps, they’re already looking for a way out and this is a good excuse for them. Likewise, if the person ends up humiliating you because of it, then this clearly indicates they’re not worth your time to begin with.
Don’t lose hope and keep dating. Eventually you’ll find someone who will accept you for you, and this is where true love begins. There are people who wouldn’t mind dating someone who is positive, and this is because they feel there is trust in the relationship. Also, there are those will say, “I understand the risks, but I’m madly in love with you.” Keeping hope is the best way to move forward.
Search for someone’s who is positive
Based on your dating style, you might want to consider looking for someone who is also positive with the same disease. There are a lot of STD personal ads and online dating website which can be used by those who have an STD. Give it a try, because a simple search on the Internet for “STD dating” will yield several results, and Meet Positives is one of them.
You Are Not Dirty
Allow us to make this point very clear, just because you have an STD, it doesn’t mean that you’re disgusting, dirty, or “damaged.” Actually, most positives didn’t do anything more than trust the wrong person.
Around 60-80% of adults in the US alone were diagnosed with an STD. Also, due to the fact viruses can spread from one person to another without penetration, but through simply oral sex, they are often left undetected. Those who usually engage is oral sex also fail to use dental dams and condoms. Thus, the spread of genital herpes, a type of STD, has gotten more common. The funny thing is, a lot of people consider HSV2 as a ‘cold sore’ and nothing serious at all.
This only implies even if you have an STD, it doesn’t mean you’re restricted from intimacy with your partner or getting turned on. However, if you would rather not explain anything at all, then you should consider dating someone who is positive as well. Start today, and never have the Talk again! Click here to join and look for free!